TEEN CENTER :: COLLEGE CENTER : FRESHMAN JOURNAL

FRESHMAN JOURNAL: AUGUST 29, 2006
Transition Anxiety

Ashley C. Sawyer

With just days before Move-in Day, I still haven't thoroughly shopped or packed for college. I look at the neat pile of stationery, bedding and wall posters in my bedroom and it reminds me of all I have left to do. The more I attempt to prepare, the more real my departure becomes.

Of course I'm looking forward to late night pizza, frat parties, deep thinking professors, and all the freedom college life represents, but whenever I look forward I still remember the days before. I still remember 12 AM curfews, cafeteria food, and basketball games without thousands of fans in the crowd.

The truth of the matter is I'll probably never have the time to have sleepovers with my closest friends, and it'll be a few long months before I can enjoy the pleasure of my own bed and a shower that I don't have to share with thirty other girls.

My parents feel it too. They look at me almost in awe, as if questioning whether I am really the same baby girl they brought back from the hospital eighteen years ago. The idea is still so foreign to them, because I am their oldest child, and I know that when the time comes for them to make the drop off, it will be followed by an onslaught of tears.

On the bright side, there are college bound seniors who have it much worse than I do. For those of us who are attempting to maintain the relationships they had with their high school boyfriends or girlfriends through college as well, the road ahead can seem even more intimidating. According to friends who have braved the transition years ahead of me, those types of relationships (which are often long distance) rarely last.

So how with the odds against you, does one prepare to say goodbye to all that's safe and familiar? Looking for new friendship and relationships and starting completely from scratch looks like the challenge of a lifetime, yet believe it or not, it's been done before.

I decided to look at beginning college life the same way I did high school. With excitement and even though this time I won't have the pleasure of taking my closest friends from middle school with me, I always have Myspace and Facebook. I reassure myself with constant reminders that my parents and brother are always only a text message away, and technology will bridge the gaps in distance between us.

Whenever I come home even with all the changes that might have taken place, my family will still be my family. Because it's so natural and I have done it so many times before, the routines of my household will still be the same. I'll probably still know where the silverware is and I'll still know how to operate all the appliances. The dog will still bark at the same times in the wee hours of the morning, and provided my parents don't make my room into office space, or worse, give it to my younger brother; my bed will still feel the same.

As for my close friends, with the thousands of people who will also be attending my university, the prospects and opportunities for new relationships are limitless. On top of the new prospects, the people I've deeply connected with, my few true friends will always be a part of me. To avoid sounding too sentimental, I'll simply acknowledge the fact that when you've shared years of the same schools, boy band crushes as well as the guilt that follows, and three hour AOL buddy chats, you can't really forget each other.

Of course with college experiences and basic differences, personalities will change and people can potentially grow apart, but I cannot imagine a time when my mother and I will not have enough in common that we won't both still enjoy Starbucks hot chocolate and Cosby Show reruns. Nor can I picture a day when my brother and I won't still argue over whose turn it is to take out the dog, the strong ties and close relationships that have been with me for most of my life will grow but they will never change, so any other changes that take place, will just be apart of the transition.

The key here, and probably in many other areas of life, is to embrace the transition, and to be flexible to all kinds of changes. I have to learn to grow, enjoy and adapt to the many different stages my life will go through, including college. If I keep my eyes open for new opportunities and look at the world with an open mind, I'm sure to find success whether close or far from home.